NOTE FOR BUSINESSES: This article describes how we can individually re-engage with the world after COVID-19 restrictions. Need help navigating the reopening challenges your business is facing? Contact me.
IT'S TIME TO GET BACK TO IT! OR IS IT?
In early 2020, the world was hit with a new reality. Words like "social distancing" and "self-isolation," became commonplace. COVID-19 brought changes to our society in ways we had never experienced. Sports events were canceled. Music festivals were postponed. Movie theaters shut their doors. As cases around the world increased, we saw social distancing guidelines put into place. International travel was canceled. Large gatherings were discouraged. Disney World closed. And it only got worse. Schools closed. We were instructed to not gather in large groups. We sat 6 feet or more from each other in restaurants. Most businesses switched to a work-from-home platform. Guidelines were put into place. We started seeing commercials for "touchless delivery" and "contact free" shopping. Dining rooms and bars closed. Churches, temples and synagogues went virtual. Amidst all the changes came heartbreaking realities. Loved ones could no longer visit family in nursing homes. Weddings were put on hold. Funerals were limited to only 10 at a time. We donned masks, closed gyms, canceled activities, vacations, and plans. We kept our distance.
It wasn't easy. Even the most introverted found themselves on a rollercoaster of emotions in the new reality. It was harder on some than others. But we all felt it. The desire to get back to where we were. To re-engage with life. To get back to "normal." Some shouted louder than others. Some demanded a return to what was. Some sat quietly with the desire for togetherness. But we all felt the pain. The pain of disconnection. Of being away from each other. We felt the grief.
But in this pain of distancing, we were also given a gift.
The gift of letting go.
For the first time in well, ever, we were collectively forced to give up activities and turn loose of those things that kept us occupied and busy. Let go of the never-ending schedule of events. Suddenly, we weren't driving the kids to endless activities. We weren't overscheduling ourselves and our partners. We no longer said yes to every invitation because we got no invitations. Many of us experienced life in a way we never had before - free from endless activities and obligations. Because of the chronic overplanning and constant busy bee-ness of our previous lives, it felt weird. Wrong. A scratchy shirt that didn't fit. But, eventually, like the smog-covered skies of LA and the murky canals of Venice, we cleared. We saw the possibility. We began to ask the question, "Do I really have to be so busy? Do I have to do life the way I always have? Is the life I previously built the right life?" The short answer? No.
The longer answer?
Still no.
It wasn't easy. Even the most introverted found themselves on a rollercoaster of emotions in the new reality. It was harder on some than others. But we all felt it. The desire to get back to where we were. To re-engage with life. To get back to "normal." Some shouted louder than others. Some demanded a return to what was. Some sat quietly with the desire for togetherness. But we all felt the pain. The pain of disconnection. Of being away from each other. We felt the grief.
But in this pain of distancing, we were also given a gift.
The gift of letting go.
For the first time in well, ever, we were collectively forced to give up activities and turn loose of those things that kept us occupied and busy. Let go of the never-ending schedule of events. Suddenly, we weren't driving the kids to endless activities. We weren't overscheduling ourselves and our partners. We no longer said yes to every invitation because we got no invitations. Many of us experienced life in a way we never had before - free from endless activities and obligations. Because of the chronic overplanning and constant busy bee-ness of our previous lives, it felt weird. Wrong. A scratchy shirt that didn't fit. But, eventually, like the smog-covered skies of LA and the murky canals of Venice, we cleared. We saw the possibility. We began to ask the question, "Do I really have to be so busy? Do I have to do life the way I always have? Is the life I previously built the right life?" The short answer? No.
The longer answer?
Still no.
"Don't leave hell empty handed"
Now is the time to decide what you bring with you from all of this. And I'm not talking strictly about the learning. I'm talking about the activities. What activities will you allow to re-enter your life? And how will you decide? The pull will be huge to simply open up the schedule and start filling it again. Along with the desire for togetherness and connection will come not only the activities that enable it, but also activities that compromise it. Instead of just accepting that the old way was the right way, you can create a new way, a new criteria to allow activities (and people and thoughts) into your life. It's not easy. But it's worth it!
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re-opening after isolationcreating your personal plan to de-quarantine and resume life
Prior to isolation, most of us allowed activities into our lives without truly examining the impact they would have. For many, that left us strung out, unbalanced, exhausted and too busy to do anything about it. Social distancing has given us the gift of being forced to let go. With that gift comes a chance to realign and re-evaluate. With a little work, you can structure a new, vibrant and powerfully energizing life that aligns with your values.
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THE STEPS
click HERE to download a printable pdf of the steps
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Make a list. Many activities have been eliminated from (or added to!) your life. Examine all areas: social, mental, school, work, spiritual, family, physical, etc. and make a giant list that includes anything that kept you or your mind busy prior to social distancing.
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Establish a new criteria. Prior to this, your criteria might have been as simple as “Can I fit it in?” or as complicated as “Keeping up with the Joneses.” Not anymore! You will now use a new and better criteria to allow activities, thoughts, people, etc. back into your life. Healthy criteria include those that align with your values, purpose, balance, growth and goals. Need help determining those? Jump to here. Use the following questions to help you determine if an item or activity should take up space in your life:
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“Intentional living is the art of making our own choices before others' choices make us.” Richie Norton
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Default to NO. For something to be allowed back into your life, it must prove itself. No longer will you allow activities, people or thoughts to be in your life “just because.” Learn to stand up for your balanced, purposeful life by saying NO.
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Go slowly! It is easier to evaluate impact if you only allow one or two activities at a time back into your life. There is no need to rush re-integration. Take it one snail step at a time.
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Observe. As those activities are let back into your life, are you experiencing any symptoms of imbalance?
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Hold loosely. Its okay to re-define your life as you go. You can say “yes” today and “no” next week to the same activity or people. Most importantly, keep shaping your life into the life that is best for you.
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